Family Acceptance

Family Acceptance Project

Family acceptance is the one thing that would change my life and would be all I need. Its all I'm asking for. If I pray quietly every night for the courage to let my parents know, or the patience when they judge and hurl insults and me, or the strength to stand up for myself when they tell me all I am is a lie, what are the chances of my prayers being heard? I saw a photo set once on Tumblr of an interviewer asking a gay man "What do you hope God will say to you at Heaven's gate?", and he simply replied "Don't listen to them, you get to come in too." And I admit I have been a bad person, I lie to take the easy way out and don't spend enough quality time with my family. I want to be a good person, I really do. But its so hard if, in order to be a good person, I have to lie to myself about who I am. 

If I could just wake up next to someone and kiss them on the forehead good morning, give them foot massages without them asking for it, make little knick-knacks by hand to give them as little gifts without having a reason, run over like a superhero with a cape during a storm but actually the cape was a blanket that I'd share with the her, make the person a child at heart where she could enjoy all the little things in life again, and do all these things with a blindfold on her, then maybe she wouldn't realise that this person who loves her is condemned to a living sin. Then maybe she won't be afraid to love me back. But I am a tornado. I hurt what I touch with gentle hands, and pull them into the same twisted fate that I am trapped in. I throw broken glass on the path on which a person walks, while the rose petals that were meant for that are crushed in my spine. 

I'm sorry for being a disappointment to my parents. And as the man in the video says, I just want to be normal.