Thursday 29 August 2013

Writings For August

"We've always talked about how one day we might bump into each other in a small book cafe, in another country. And why not, it's a small world after all."

Sometimes I wonder if I'm the only one who's felt this way, but the self-righteous coward in me tells me it isn't true. I couldn't possibly be the only person who's ever felt a little tied back in their life. How sorrowful is it that I'm writing about a past lover after almost a year has passed? Not very actually. I'm sure we all know of a person who's fearful of meeting their ex because it would be awkward, or because ever since they broke up, their lovey dovey baby girl darling has completely transformed into a maneating monstrous bitch. To be honest, I did feel that we were heading in that direction for a while, and I was really embarassed to admit to myself that we were gonna be living proof that exes cannot be friends.

They say that you'll never forget your first love. So maybe that's the reason behind how I feel. But I also believe that there's a reason why you loved them in the first place, and as the reasons differ from person to person, often, what you love the person for becomes irreplaceable. I fell in love with the way she wrote, the twists of ink on faded pencil lines, the sincerity that warmed up those words as they passed through the depths of my mind. I fell in love with how the sentences wrapped around my thoughts and how each one was spoken as if it echoed from deep inside the chambers of myself. And I fell in love with knowing that even for the few seconds that she took to write it down, I was on her mind.

That's probably the reason why I feel that even though I'm happy where I am now looking right up at the life before me, there's a part a part of the past that I'm in love with, and this time, the part of the past doesn't interfere with my present, and it is ineffably beautiful. So perhaps one day, I will bump into her in some old book cafe in another country, and perhaps, a new friendship could be written.

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